Embrace Your Heart’s Desire To Dress Like Your Secret Admirer

On a recent sunny Friday morning, as I walked down the block every day before I left work, I realized a problem. I looked down at my black slip-on Vans, my Nili Lotan Carpenter khakis, and my Rowing Blazers striped football, and it hit me. I dress like my supposed crush. It’s a strange feeling to realize that you’re subconsciously wearing clothes that you find attractive in another person. Of course, that’s not what Gloria Steinem calls“Too many people looking for the right person, instead of trying to be the right person.”. Maybe I’m becoming the Crush I want to see in the world, or maybe I’ve become myself. Either way, the suit feels right.

For the past few months, I’ve been accidentally imitating the styles of Jacob Elodie, Oscar Isaac, and Pitter Donald Davidson (to name just a few examples of people I’ve had a crush on) , succumb to the gravity of Sambas, well-cut slacks, tie-dyed t-shirts and worn-out hats. At the same time, I noticed that this phenomenon developed in other people. Fashion historian and author Ruby Redstone recently found a pair of Adidases to complete the Harry Styles outfit, and TikTok founder Kiki shared a summary of her crush on clothing, the headline is: “Don’t date your type. Dress like it.”. A subtle sign of admiration, dressing like your crush is the most romantic thing in fashion (even if your crush is Plato) . It is defined not by the folds and flowers we associate with romantic style-though it may be-but by the wearer’s definition of what is desirable to be infatuated with. It’s not so much about being noticed by the people we like as about trying on their looks. For Me, it helps me better understand my own fashion (and romantic) desires.

I dare say that my own adoption of the shattering look was the result of a readjustment. Over the past three years, my personal style has changed as the fashion pendulum has swung from prairie sleeves to cargo pants and small t-shirts. Although I’ve been drawn to the copycat style, which Emma does very well, and which we usually categorize as romantic, but those colorful pieces now seem to be relics of my former self and ideals. After a paradigm shift (read: engagement over and international move) , those sweet, soft dresses suddenly feel too precious. In hindsight, I could see how the period of redefining my desires affected (and changed) what I wanted to wear. I felt I had to take this moment in my life as an opportunity to discover something new, starting with my closet. One of the easiest exchanges? The prairie dress was replaced with cargo pants and palabate pants. Boom-i found another fashion personality in myself.

To better understand what it means to dress like someone I have a crush on, i asked my friends, Chef and creative consultant Tara Tomas and model and startup community director Mariah Carey Mittendorff, to assess what it means to embrace a different style that you find attractive. Tara and Mariah Carey see it as a means of self-exploration “Crushcore is cosplay, romantic or Plato, out of appreciation,” Tara says. It takes that person’s essence like a souvenir and becomes part of your identity.”

In Mariah Carey’s case, dressing to reflect what she likes is a sign of self-acceptance and a return to independence. Kighley stresses that her core archetypes are singer Redcar, actress Kristen Stewart and model Saskia de Brauff, whose style conveys essence, “They both had an interesting androgynous style,” she says, but the approaches are very different. “When I learned how this translates into the person I’m attracted to (aesthetically or otherwise!) And why and how it’s reflected, I felt strongly that clothes can be used to express any gender, for anyone.” While crushcore is an interesting way to dress, but it’s also a formula for breaking out of our typical uniform. It’s a way to break through any subconscious beliefs surrounding the role we might feel we should convey.

The key difference between wearing your favorite clothes and wearing your favorite person’s clothes is that the latter has a new perspective. It is to discover something new by dressing. The contrast between the prairie dress I mentioned earlier and the current, uh, warm-blooded male vibe made me realize how much our surroundings affect what we want to wear.

While I’m sure my definition of a style worthy of shattering will continue to change, I hope that the romantic pursuit of daydreaming will remain stable through the way I dress. It requires a major life change around how I think I should present my old ideas and rethink the implicit limitations of fashion. I like that our clothes can change the way we present ourselves to the world and bring out different aspects of our personality. Now, I have accepted my multi-faceted fashion. Sometimes I want to be Justin Timberlake Bieber of the YouTube age, and other times, i prefer the aesthetic of the Morten Olsen Twins (a sundress and a baseball cap — not exactly flattering) in need of two. To me, Jacob Elordi is an ideal Shredder competitor because he shows the range of his experiments. The pants looked good, and Vans confirmed that the 13-year-old boy who loved skateboarding was still out there somewhere. In addition to the clothes, there is an energy-the feeling of not tying your shoelaces, of being free-that I find attractive. Like, dude, I’m just running an errand, okay? A few years ago, I might not have allowed myself to embrace this carefree, freewheeling side of myself. But that’s what I want my crush to be able to do, and by dressing like them, it’s easier to bond.

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